September 17, 2013

How To Talk To Boys Or Get Their Attention

Because never having a boyfriend makes me an expert. 

I thought what better way to embarrass myself out of the pure need for entertainment then talk about how I can not talk to boys. So I shall post about my failed attempts to try to talk to a guy and other times where I just make a fool of myself in front of guys. So if you think you're bad in the whole boy department... I will make you feel better.

Number One
Now let me set the stage... we are at a play. I see a cute guy and I decide it's time it's time to really go for it. So what did I do!? After my friend said hey you did a great job I made a rainbow shape with my ring finger as I proudly proclaimed YEAH! It's true. This is all true.... what miraculous, clever idea did my brain come with... I said yeah. (My brain does this often... just wait) He just stared at me. Needless to say, we obviously never really became friends.

Number Two
It is once again freshman year, this was a good year for me (clearly.) I am at a volleyball tournament and this guy happens to be there, this guy I literally see everywhere. Now I joked in my head like I could hit him in the head with a volleyball.... and decided that is pathetic and I will not stoop to such things. Well as I went to hit a volleyball, it went straight for his head and hit him. Needless to say I am still mortified and am most likely blushing as I write this, I mean I HIT HIM IN THE HEAD. Luckily there was no like damage done, except for my emotional turmoil. 

Number Three
So here we are it's the same night about a hour and a half later, I decided I have embarrassed myself enough. But my legs had decided that I needed one more embarrassing moment to take the cake of embarrassing moments. To this day nothing has beat this.. I am a walking embarrassment and klutz. I decided that since I had to walk to my friends anyway and the guy who is attractive happened to be standing right along the path to them, I could walk so gracefully he would have no choice to notice me and we could become friends. WELL GUESS WHAT... HE DID. But it was not because I am a graceful swan lake type as I walk, it's because I somehow tripped on air/leg spasmed and almost landed into his arms but somehow got my balance and found my grip right before that. Yeah he laughed, I turned into a tomato and barely got out the words "sorry," Though I don't know why I was apologizing... I am so lovely. 

Number Four
We are walking out of the disney store and just roaming when who do I see coming towards us? Volleyball let me hit you and trip infront of you boy. (Who might I add is also let me accidentally slap you in the face with doors, literally run into you about five different times, and much more) well there he is. So I decided I am about to make a fool of myself so I need to leave stat. But my friend, oh my friend who has no boundaries decides I need to up the anti on how awkward our run ins can be. As he passes us she yells out YOU GO TO LIBERTY. He turns... as he has a creeped out look on his face. She runs towards him and proceeds to mention how she saw him in a hallway once... 

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